I've been dealing with the truth for the past couple days. It's been painful, maybe even gut-wrenching. The thing that's crazy is that it's truth I've known inside me for a long time. It's been a well kept secret. It's one of those things that I thought not saying out loud would keep it from being true.
But in my pursuit of BRAVE, I've found truth to be popping up everywhere. I'm not talking the sweet sort of truth. I'm talking the ugly truth. It's breaking me open. I thought the truth was supposed to set us free, but there seem to be a lot of long dark detours on the way to free.
And with those raw emotions I went to school today. I wish I could have worn a sign that said, "Please be gentle. I'm fragile." Instead I had several encounters that made me feel way not enough. I felt all day like I sucked at my job, and I wondered why I didn't do more work over Winter Break. (There is something very sinister in that.) I think I was actually a good teacher today in the face of all of this, and I'm trying to believe that truth, too.
Here's my giving update:
#2 Lunch for Tammy
#3 Compliments to Cashier
#4 Math materials for team teacher